Having a happy cat,
having an extremely happy bird, or simply,

having two happy birds?

Confessions of A Dota-holic

~Prologue~

Wanna get a grasp on the first-hand experience of an ex dota-addict? Read on or find any other things that will interest you in this page or just click the X button. Feel free to recommend this page to your dota-infested friends =)


My memory always fails me so I just want this post to be a reminiscence of dota's good times and... bad times. But before we start, please be warned that it's some long text coupled with heavily-loaded images ahead.

Now, shall we begin?



~Confessions of A Dota-holic~

One hundred and sixty-five;
1...6...5... days without dota.


For 5 years, the popular LAN/online gaming at any particular point of time will be either
  • DotA & WoW,
  • Dota & CS (yes it's my initial),
  • DotA & COD or
  • DotA & L4D.

From v5.84c till v6.xx now, DotA's fad never dies. It has never failed to live up to expectations and has never, ever, been out of popularity. And just by hearing Lich, CM, SA, stuns, blink or any other dota heroes and skills, chills would be sent down the spines of all dota players, me included (okay, i know i'm exaggerating lol).

It feels so so good to play dota. I played for 4 freaking full years and i loved it so so much that i could literally call dota (and books) my gfs. They argued kinda often. But me being me, my time-management skills (ss detected) allowed me to devote enough time in both. so they could actually still live in harmony lol.

I still miss this loading screen. Talk about memories!
I had looked at this for at least... a few hundred times?


And people asked me, how did i stop dota so easily?! well, there is obviously a motivation behind my stopping dota but too bad, it is the only part of the full confession that will be kept a secret. Seriously, it is that simple. Just stop playing, tell your mind to stop and you will!


The 'uninstall warcraft' trick won't work if your mind is not engineered to uninstall it. In fact, one of my friends (ek hem, L&F lol) have reinstalled many times but they are still playing it! lol. And you may be surprised to hear that I still have war3 in my hard disk, and as a matter of fact, the garena and ventrilo icons still appear on my desktop! swt


Now moving on to confessions.

I was a disciplined kid (i still am =p). In fact, I was so disciplined that i woke up at 7-7.15 every off day (no-class day) just to play dota. Cool? I would sometimes dream of dota and my heart would be beating so fast that I had to wake up and cure this addiction lol. And no, u won't understand what no-life is. But at least, the everlasting effect of this symptom is good: now i can wake up early at any time! ask anyone around me? =)

On top of that, I would spend hours on forums to study dota. We even had formulae to calculate what items you should buy at what stage, which skills to learn before which and/or which skills to throw at the enemy first.


Apart from causing mental disruption (as some would call it because we need dota drug) and time-wasting that could seriously damage your life, almost all other aspects of dota are good if you know how to control yourselves!

First, it is a stress-reliever. Killing people in-game, assisting teammates and dying (and shouting profanities) bring some feel-good factors. But okay, there is a bad side to it as I have encountered three separate incidents where my good friends actually argued with each other over ks (kill-stealing) issues. lol but another upside is that you would learn anger management along the way too =p

Second, it improves your typing speed. When the game develops so fast and backstabbing happens every other minute, you would have to learn to type fast. What i enjoyed the most was scolding people (non-friends in pub games) while i was being revived. Just imagine when the death timer starts ticking and you would have 30-90 seconds to scold as much as you want. lol syok like crazy.

Third, it improves your vocab. Being someone who had 1 year of malay (and jawi!) education in tadika and 10 years of education in a chinese school, and without much exposure to english-speaking people around, you would have guessed how my english vocab's like. Limited, yea that's the word. DotA taught me a lot of words that I would otherwise not have encountered elsewhere. And seriously, those non-gamers who think that most games use low quality english, I am here to tell you that you're wrong! =)

December 08 - January 09 was the best and worst dota period of all. The best part? I met three pro and nice kaki's (not sure whether i should list their names here but the initials are L,F,H lol. u know who u are.) Those were easily the most enjoyable dota sessions that i have ever had for 4 years - no offence to those who teman me play before that.

We actually had a clan (yea Xn.C) and played clan wars almost every night. And we even installed software so that we could speak to each other in real time. I enjoyed the arguments we had on picking roles and heroes but the best thing in a team game was that we knew that we could count on each other and that each of us would be willing to sacrifice anything in-game to win as a team.

Caption: Wee, i have the highest number of assists here... and just for the records, I always had the most team assists in clan games because i don't ks! =)

During that period of time, my normal working hours were from 8.30 to around 8.30. I would get home immediately after work, have dinner and sit in front of the pc waiting for my kaki's to come online. The weirdest thing is that even though i often slept at 2+ and woke up at 7, i felt energetic all day long even when i was working. I did yawn a lot while working but my mind was as sharp, and that my commitment to my work never diminished. Quality of the work was assured too, so much so that the partner and director liked it a lot. =D

'Quality in everything we do'. Does it ring a bell?

And I don't know whether this is normal but the best part of dota that I like is to start things afresh. Each game brings something different and will rarely be the same. Events are different, actions are different so of course, the outcome will be different too.

For those who have played with me for a long time, they would have noticed that I love to play the opening 10 mins and that I suck especially at late game. I am not sure why either but I guess the reason is that I like to start things out in the best possible way? It's similar to the Pokemon's concept when you save and load the game every 10 seconds just so that you will meet rare pokemons instead of the same old boring ones in the bushes or that you can hypnotise or use ultimate skills successfully every time. lol

My all-time signature heroes: Chen, the Holy Knight, and


Boush, the Tinker.


Where I dominate and own early game, and then feed all the way to heaven =)


Last month's exams were really a special testing time for myself. While in the previous years, I would have struggled a lil bit to stop dota, I had never failed to motivate myself to get good results. But remember that i said i was disciplined? Right, i would stop dota 1 week before exams without failure everytime, almost everytime i mean, okok i meant most often that not or err... maybe 'a simple majority of the time' is more accurate lol.

And you know what, I thought about this critically and I think the real reason could be attributed to the fact that while I was going for personal achievement in the prior years, my subconscious mind had been telling myself to get good results to justify the view that all the hours spent (most poeple read it as 'wasted') on dota do NOT affect one's results!

Fortunately, I think the exam for this sem went okay eventually. But it's most probably because i'm lucky to have open book exams for 3 out of 4 papers!

~Epilogue~

Dota is not a bad thing after all but unless u know how to find a balanced lifestyle, please leave it alone. I was not good in handling it, and that was why i stopped.

I have been wanting to write out my thoughts about this a long time ago and I guess this is the time to release it. For those who want to stop dota addiction (namely L, F, H and others), please contact the hotline: 999. =)

I have taken a big step and I am set for more. But before that, I just need a day some time soon to hibernate and recollect all my thoughts. Self-renewal is in the list.

* Some parts are fictional but most are facts. haha.

Comments (5)

Dota-holic...
dude, u have forgotten to put Puck :) you cant deny that u are a good supporter ( at least most of the time, i mean those time that u din kena bullied LOL)
well, obviously... i am L.. but not the L inside deathnote.. haha
In Dota.. i think i am nothing different from the L in deathnote , ended up being killed =.= (self praise or .. )haha.. so its ok to confuse u all now ..haha..

as the stupid comment do not accept comment that exceeded 4,096 characters..i have to post up a few then haha

actually dota is a super game.. why do i use super ?
it keeps on improving.. can u imagine? i sticked to the game for more than 6 years... this is the only game i played...( others mayb yes too.. but 1-2 mths max)
the superb good feel of winning a game...really causes addiction...
U may ask.. WHAT IF YOU LOSE? omg.. ARE YOU A MAN ? IF YOU ARE... RISE from WHERE you FALL !!!
Can u ever imagine how nice it feel when u rise from the ground once again ?

Actually dota is a good game.. it is well developed. i think i view this game differently from other player. Why?
well, i am not talking bout stress relief , time management...
but i am talking about strategies..
there are more than 85 heroes in the game.. all equiped with 4 diff skills( except invoker) , on top of that, items comes with skill as well ( dagon, necro, meka..)..
u have to fight in a team against 5 players..
each player choose 1 hero with 6 slot for items.. can u imagine the combination ?
Yes, if your dota skill is outstanding, of coz it wont be a big deal.. what what i am sayign now is.. WHAT if .. the level of skill are similar?? ( since everyone have been dealing with it for years~)

dota player spend their hours in farming ( earn money) to buy items.. if they buy something useless/wrongly.. normally his game will be ended up with a lost..

when u are playing with a team, normally u need a leader.. and i believe this is very important in real life as well. Of coz, all member are expected to follow the leader's command.. leader here cannot dominate all the decision of coz.. in fact, he must respect the teammate's viewpoint.. to push or not to push.. who shud def now.. who should keep on farming.. who shall we ambush.. when shall we push and etc.. basically a leader must know this well..
he must have a clear picture on his member's ability.. and what item they have farmed, also what level are their heroes..(using opponent's heroes as benchmark)..
if u put this into real life, don't it seems to be familiar? a strategy management.. u have to know ur company and employee very well, of coz u always have to compare with ur competitors.. and develop a strategy to "kill" them in order to get a greater market share..

also, dota player are trained to have macro view... or global view..
under the bottom left.. theres a minimap..the minimap shows the on going event happens in the game...if u too focus on the game and din notice the minimap.. OK.. i guarantee that u're gone.. either kena ambushed.. or u stil farming happily when ur base kena sapu~ of coz this is the common mistake of most player..
but if u used to the minimap.. eventhough u fully concentrate on the game part.. u wil always noticed the minor changes in the map..
again, back to real life..when we talk bout business plan..or business strategy.. management strategy etc.. we always focus too much on the strategy itself..do u know? some strategy takes mths/years ? if u too focus on the strategy and never aware of the changes in the global.. u are doomed..any minor changes is critical enough to cost your whole business. :)


well, i have to admit that dota is all about time management.. its nth to do with game..this is personal... i have to admit that.. when i was with my ex gf.. i really spent too much of my time in dota as compare to her.. but this is not the real reason of why we broke up la haha... yet i think it does contribute something to her decision .. a dota holic --> for sure.. less caring to his gf..
if u don admit it... no choice.. jus imagine.. when u fully commited into one game.. and she called u.. what will u do? u cant pause the game.. don tell me.. jus think..what wil she feel if she notice u are not concentrate to talk with her? or mayb other silly thing u said to her ? THINK

besides, most dota holic got bad temper.. really bad temper.. he/she can be a good good person in real life ( when they haven't encounter any trouble) but he will definately show their furious faces inside a game..start scolding like mad...its insane..
of coz, i am referring to dota-holic.. for those who used to be scolded or those who don bother win or lose.. its different...
but... we born in malaysia.. so close to singapore.. do u enjoy losing a game? NO, GIA SU virus ..spread faster than H1N1..

well, i am L.. someone who purposely passby and leave a comment.. i am back to dota world after quiting for mths.. but definately will quit again haha...

hopefully i din write more than the author.. haha.. sorry CS !

oh ya.. i tell u all, CS very funny one.. while playing dota..we use ventrino to communicate.. something like skype but meant for game.. we started our conversation in Chinese/mandarin.. but when the game become very gan cheong.. the tempo of the game become very fast..(e.g. all enemy missing and wanna ambush someone.. or they are pushing when we got no hero to defence..) , our dear fren CS, Started to speak english haha!!!!

so if u notice he speak english in game.. it means that he very gan cheong ady and his heartbeat/pulse surely damn fast lol...

am i right ? :)


regards,
L ( this initial is damn cool haha)

Brother L,

Sai mm sai gam cheong hei? is it more than 1k words? it's so long that i don't know where to begin with. Lol btw, you can start writing a thesis for PhD in DotA.

All the things you mentioned are more easily achievable through clan wars. don't waste ur time on pub games d! lol

And I never realised that I speak english when I'm nervous. I think it's because H doesn't speak mandarin, that's why I'm using english to inform everyone about the emergencies. Haha

Anyway, control your urge to dota k. You still have several other missions to do, including your weight loss program hahahahaha.